We have all experienced those moments of anxiousness. We have all been there.Moments before the crucial job interview and you’re pacing up and down the lobby, all sweaty – palmed and nervous. Or the time you have your first date and you’re a nervous wreck with apprehension that he/ she may not like you.

If you are student, those brief moments before the results are announced are nerve wrecking. These are the times when even your grandma would have had a pep talk about confidence had she known what it takes to get some. It is key to understand what leads to lack of confidence and then go about bolstering it.

1. Confidence is all about what is inside of you than what is outside in the world.

Something like immunity? Yes. That kind. Your confidence takes shape as you respond to people and situations. But if what is inside of you isn’t in order, any amount of a pep talk wouldn’t work.

Accept yourself (and your family, upbringing, memories and everything else you’ve been born with). There are things you can never change. You would, if you could. Then why fret. Focus on those that can be improved.

2. It all starts with what is visible.

Amy Cuddy says in her TED talk – fake it till you make it.Look up and imitate the power pose. Stand erect and spread your body reasonably large. Grin in the mirror. Speak at a steady pace and in a soft voice.

Speaking loudly and hastily is a clear sign of lack of confidence when you try to make up with loudness. Your confidence (or lack of it) shows with your body first. That hunch of your back, those eyes that skirt your feet, the trembling hands and the wiggly legs do not spell CONFIDENCE in any language. Observe how you stand, walk, talk, make eye contact, stretch out your back and shake hands with others. Be normal and enjoy every moment. No person you meet or no situation you encounter is bigger than what you decide. Stand erect, don’t fidget. Make a firm handshake. Look into the eye when you speak but don’t linger more than 5 seconds at a stretch.

3. Develop your strengths.

You are always comfortable when you’re armed with the right armaments. Be skillful in at least some form. Have in depth knowledge about something you can talk about. Be well informed. Most of the times, social embarrassments due to lack of confidence are a result of being scared of not knowing enough. 

One must be able to hold a conversation with anyone for at least 10 minutes on a topic of their interest. Being well informed allows you to participate in discussion and contribute too. It also holds you in good stead before strangers who gauge you for your knowledge. Read more....